Buttons Buttons Everywhere…

...where they drop, I just don't care.

My coat-- the really, really expensive Irene Van Ryb that I bought at a Soho boutique before I moved to Chicago, is shedding buttons. I have already had all of the buttons on the front of the coat (you know; the ones that keep the coat closed) re-sewn and reinforced and had to visit Tender Buttons a couple of times to match up lost souls (little tiny buttons made of some sort of animal bone that attach the detachable hood to the inside collar). But they're still falling off! It's actually gotten comical because so far in the first three days of this week I've lost three-- THREE; and (here comes the comical part), I DON'T KNOW WHERE THEY'RE COMING FROM. I've found 2 little guys and a big one, and I can't for the life of me figure out where they're from. I hear them hit the floor and I look down, pick them up and then do the perennial scan: front buttons? Check. Sleeve buttons (which, by the way, are stupid because they're decorative, not functional, and while I'm all for design accoutrements, decorations that make you worry about whether or not you're going to lose them are a complete waste of time)? Check, check. Inside collar buttons? Check, check, check. Where the hell are these buttons coming from!?! So now I have three buttons, definitely from my coat, sitting on the edge of my front hall mirror, wondering if they will have a home again. As though there's not enough crazy in my life.